The correct training of your two-legs… ‘specially visiting two-legses…is critical to their well-being. I thought I’d share my ten favourite tips for the establishment of proper pack behaviour…
1. Use advanced surveillance techniques. Never let them arrive unexpectedly. This gives you a
unfair unique advantage. You, of course, will know long before your two-legs that a visitor is arriving. They have to wait for a knock on the door. Which means, you can be ready… and waiting…
2. Decontamination. You don’t know where they’ve been… they may even have been near cats! But a thorough washing both cleans them up and lets you investigate. They, poor things, have a problem with soap and smelly stuff… they smear it all over. They taste a lot better when it is all gone. They think you are being cute and giving kisses… but that’s okay. We know better… And anyway, if they are going to stuff us in baths with their smelly stuff, what do they expect?
3. Let them play. They like to think they know best. They also think they understand humour. There are limits, however. Me, I draw the line at coats and fluffy jumpers. I know some short-hairs like ’em them in cold weather, but I’m quite happy in my own skin. Still, if you let them play their games, they have no excuses when it’s your turn π
4. Establish firm boundaries. This is especially important with regards to your sofa. It may be necessary to demonstrate… If they still don’t get it, ignore them. Then, if all else fails, sit on ’em.
5. Establish ownership. While it is possible to allow your two-legs a certain amount of freedom, it is best to show them quite clearly in which areas you are in charge. This obviously includes the ‘fridge and its contents.
6. Obedience training. Set the ground rules early and be consistent. This should be one of your first priorities. They need to know exactly what you expect of them.
7. Prevent boredom. A bored two-legs will only get into trouble. Stimulate their minds by setting them puzzles. It might take them a while to work out what they are supposed to be doing, but it keeps them out of mischief. Just give them some attention and encourage them…
8. Keep them active. Your two-legs need plenty of exercise… ‘specially if they are inclined to sit in front of their little boxes all day. Two…or three…nice long walks every day should do the trick, but you can always encourage some activity in the gym too…
9. Encourage a healthy diet. This means making sure they keep you well supplied with food, treats and tidbits. Their diet doesn’t bear thinking about. Apart from the cheese and the chicken…. I think ’bout those a lot.
10. Keep them happy. Give them plenty of cuddles so they know they are loved. Listen to them when they talk to you, be aware of their feelings… and share every laughing moment you can with them.
Remember, a happy, healthy two-legs will, if properly loved and cared for, last you a lifetime.
Much love,
Ani xxx
That’s so True Ani , trouble is it can get very tedious, they are not the fastest learners but they get there in the end. Love Ruby πππ
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Usually… but they are worththe effort, Ruby β€
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Yes they are πππ
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Good list, Ani. You’re definitely good at your job!
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I do my best π
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Yes, Ani, and I especially liked number four. Well said! If they still get squirmy, wag your tail in their face…
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That usually works π
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Good advice, every bit of it. And great photos π
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Thank you π
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When we got our new loveseat, the one “item” we found under the old one was Duke’s squeaky yellow tennis ball. He was so glad to have it back. He has lots of balls, but only ONE that squeaks. It too may last a lifetime.
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You can’t even call Ani’s favourite a ball any more π
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A lovely light hearted post, Sue. Just the thing to start a Monday.
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Glad you enjoyed it, Robbie.
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Well, you’ve certainly got your rules down to a T! Personally, I hear the door, unfamiliar voices, and go and hide!
Love, Sonu Singh β€ πΎ
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I never know what they might be good for π xx
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π₯°
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Reblogged this on Chris The Story Reading Ape's Blog and commented:
Great advice from, Ani ππ
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Thank you for sharing, Chris xxx
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Welcome, Sue – my four-legs followers like to be kept informed as well π
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π
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Oh, Ani – you’re a card…You certainly know how to use those soulful eyes to wind your two-legs around your pΓ ws and heart all right…You won’t even need to send your two-legs for a training course! Woof. xx
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No… I already have mine trained π xxx
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Great advice, Ani! I’m still working on my humans. Your friend Dot.
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They do take a bit of training π
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The sad thing is, they don’t last us a lifetime π¦
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I know… but the love does.
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Ani, you’re a genius. I’ve finally worked out what Mogi has been doing all these years. I don’t suppose you have any advice about cats?
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Only chasing them π x
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Mmm…Mogi doesn’t chase her cats. They have her well trained. I think it’s because they’re bigger than her. It’s not easy being part Chihuahua.
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You have a point there…
Did you know we call a cat a #moggy# here? π
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lol – we call them moggies here too, but Mogi is actually short for Mogwai – the little creature in the kid’s film, the one with the huge ears. This dog really does have Dumbo sized ears!
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Ah… no water after midnight then π
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-giggles- heaven forbid!
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π
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Ani, you’re so smart! I wish I was as brave as you are with new two-leggeds come into the house. Unless I’ve been taken care of by them, I run and hide. Maybe that comes from being raised in a shelter?
Your orange friend, Garfield
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It might at that, Garfield. I just give them a tennis ball… if they know which end is which, we can be friends π
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These are great tips, Ani. Lots of licks, Lilie
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Thanks, Lilie xxx
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That last photo! Oh my goodness never seen a dog with such expressive eyes!
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She is a ham π
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You are so right Ani! We’ve got to keep our two legses on their toes and occupied. Haven’t quite perfected the ball in the fridge yet, but the baby in the lap works!!
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Ball in the fridge tends to throw them a bit π
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I bet!!
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π
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Reblogged this on Smorgasbord Blog Magazine and commented:
There are few experts in the field of human behaviour that I respect more than a dog.. They watch us closely from the first moment that they catch your scent… I am going to hand you over to one such expert.. Ani who has ten very important lessons to impart… read and learn…
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The expert thanks you for the reblog, Sally π xx
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She is very welcome.. β₯
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Bless you, Ani…I would need more than a lifetime with a friend like you!
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β€
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Reblogged this on Anita Dawes & Jaye Marie ~ Authors.
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Ani says thank you for sharing xx
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XX
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Delightful, dear Ani! β€ xo
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β€ x
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Thank you, Ani! I shall pass along your advice to my dog. He’ll know just what to do with it.
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He probably already knows π
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π
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I think that’s a great training manual book Ani! Lol, you’re a great training coach! β€
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Plenty of preactice, training my two-legs π x
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β€ xxx
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Excellent tips. My favorite tip is number 10 – love, cuddles, listening, and laughter. π
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They are always the best π
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β€
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First, let me compliment you on your tongue, Ani. If you’re going to give out some kisses, these may as well be wet and sloppy.π€£
We two-legs are a lot of trouble. Thanks for tolerating us. I love all of your tips, especially #2. I feel like I need to apologize to my dog, Lulu, if I ever come home smelling of dog. She accuses me of cheating on her. I would never do such a thing.
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Ah… it could be worse for Lulu… you could come home smelling of cat π
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You’ve got this, Ani, you really have! π Love ‘if all else fails, sit on ’em’ – great advice, and hilarious! And that last photo – absolutely priceless. Wonderful. π β€
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π π
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Is it any wonder that a dog is man( and woman)’s best friend. Enjoyable post, Sue. β€
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No wonder at all, Carol β€
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So true – and very funny!
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π
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Duke has a firm grip on the sofa, but now we are in serious contention for possession of the bed. Also, he has the same ball. That’s the one that beeps, right? Because the Duke’s squeaks. He also has a bunch of non-squeakers, but they have dispersed until the next time we move the furniture.
Chicken is good for everyone. Especially the soup!
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This ball doesnβt even roll, let alone bounce any more π
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